Opinion
Come hither, my brethren, let us unite once more over our love of all things saucy. As Valentine’s Day is approaching, and is thus undoubtedly on the minds of most women out there, I feel a slight m...
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For those who have followed the situation, and even for those who haven’t, the story being told about Mali will be both convincing and familiar. It goes like this: In a part of the world known for i...
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Since I don’t expect that many of you would have noticed (and for good reason), I have a news flash for you: The French have actually won a war. Okay, maybe it wasn’t really an actual war, and the...
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Q: Apparently, HPV is rampant among college students. As a female, I’m afraid of getting it and then developing cervical cancer. How can I protect myself against contracting HPV? Is the Gardasil vac...
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Why do atheists try to exert so much influence on public opinion if they know they are a minority? In brief, you don’t need to be in a majority to have principles worth sharing. Whether or no...
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Two years ago, I traveled to Washington, D.C. to participate in a youth leadership conference. Over the course of a week, I had the privilege of exploring our nation’s capitol along with a group of ...
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With Community Housing Office (CHO) as your ringleader, you won’t get “clowned” during the Isla Vista housing shuffle. Here are some dos and don’ts regarding choosing roommates, finding a plac...
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This week I think I’ll talk rather seriously about labels, how stupid I think they are and the definition of sexuality. I apologize in advance, dear readers, for the lack of witty one-liners. I tend...
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Last week President Obama gave liberals the speech they wanted to hear: His rhetoric was lofty, historically conscious and unabashedly progressive. Now that the goose bumps have settled, however, we w...
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Just in case you missed it or decided not to tune in, the president made another bluntly polemical campaign speech last Monday. No, the 2014 midterm elections haven’t already started (yet). I am, of...
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Yes, I know it is hard to believe, but I am a jerk. Actually, it should be another more descriptive word, but this is a family-friendly newspaper. Well, except for on Wednesdays. By the way, the Opini...
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I learned the difference between dissociative identity disorder and role-play in my first year at UCSB. My freshman roommate, who declared in psychology during Zero Week, went a long way to help me un...
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“Turn on, tune in, drop out”: this six word catchphrase coined by the psychologist Timothy Leary is most closely associated with the drug counterculture and progressive social transformation of th...
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Disclaimer: I think it’s important to note that I use the proper noun “God” in reference to the preexisting, visualized God of various world religions, and the improper noun “god” in referen...
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Gather round, gather round, one and all. Today our topic is one of much excitement: kinky sex. But before we get there we must take a peek into my past, so you can understand how I have suffered for t...
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Everything shower every day
Has an extensive tote bag collection but never brings one to Trader Joe’s
Reusing condoms
Collecting tears to water their plants
Asking to shower together to “save water”
Air conditioning and electric blanket running simultaneously
Has gone from Temu to SHEIN for bikini purchases
Fracking
On their 10th flight out of Santa Barbara Airport this month
Owns seven Stanley cups
Wrote their environmental ethics essay with ChatGPT
Vegan contributing to Big Almond
