We had to do it.
1. Hitting on women
Expectation:
They imagine they’re always on like Don Juan.
Reality:
Everyone: *collective sigh*
2. Drinking Alcohol
Expectation:
The embodiment of Old School, Animal House, and every Judd Apatow movie ever.
Reality:
Everyone is planning an intervention for them next week.
3. Threesomes
Expectation:
Threesomes are awesome and they’re awesome for having them.
Reality:
The disappointment and shame will last longer than they did.
4. Hazing
Expectation:
Part of a grand and historic tradition.
Reality:
The opposite of Batman.
5. Fashion
Expectation:
Reality:
6. Police
Expectation:
The Gestapo just won’t let them have a good time.
Reality:
Rebels without a cause.
7. Rush Week
Expectation:
We all want to join them.
Reality:
By the end of the week, all of their fliers have given Mother Nature a paper cut.
8. Dancing
Expectation:
Moves better than Jagger.
Reality:
They are better off just not moving.
TL;DR Version
Expectation:
Reality: