“Mean Girls” said it best: “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.”

And almost every girl takes full advantage of it here at UCSB, Thursday through Monday.

But who said Halloween only has to last five nights?

To be honest, the costumes we love the most are essentially lingerie with a few characteristic accessories and makeup touches — “I’m a mouse, DUH.”

After spending $62.95 to prance around I.V. as a sultry first mate, you might as well get the literal bang for your buck. I’m not saying you should regularly run around looking like a slut, because I will judge you then. But to do so in the privacy of your room? You go, Glenn Coco.

We’ve all fantasized about being the sexy librarian, naughty schoolgirl, busty nurse, elusive Playboy bunny … the list goes on, and I guarantee your study buddy is dying to help you work your way down it. And up it. And through it … in the projection room above the auditorium.

Make it as extensive or short-lived as you want. Role playing is hot as hell. Channel our favorite Brits, David Beckham and Posh Spice — you know you’ve thought about how great their sex has to be — and you’ll be fornicating like never before … all fierce and repulsively good-looking. And I’m not talking about soccer when I say bend it like Beckham. Spice up your life people — just like math, sex is the same in every country.

There’s something about role playing that’s somewhat insightful. Your closet sex addict has a way of surfacing under the facade of your character and its honestly quite liberating — you may never admit to yourself that you have that alter ego (Boo, you whore), so the seductive burlesque costume is the perfect disguise.

When it comes down to it, we all love Halloween. There’s a reason we’re already plotting next year’s scantily clad outfits. So, why wait a full year to dress up when you’ve got a perfectly good excuse to do so in the bedroom?