OMG guys, the day’s finally here. Death Cab is coming!!! I’m soooo excited. I’ve been craving some depressing, super mellow, over-literate alterna-rock for so long and now it’s here! I’ve got to pick out my best, striped emo hoodie, tight pants and Converse sneakers immediately. Like, I need DCFC to know how much of a fan I am, and I’m not like those posers who are just into them now that it’s trendy. I even registered to vote like twenty times just so we’d win the free concert contest. Oh shit, don’t tell Pappas.

Tomorrow’s forecast: Pappas jokes finally get old.