Remember how yesterday I said Michael Phelps’ weed smoking would impact the children and stuff? Turns out it happened quicker than I expected. Apparently some cops found 9,210 pounds of weed in an abandoned school bus in Texas. This would hardly be news if it were a VW bus, but a school bus? Clearly our nation’s youth are being corrupted with alarming speed. Then again, if my generation’s musical go-to was the Jonas Brothers, I’d probably need a couple tons of weed too.

Tomorrow’s forecast: I’m sure some of you will read this and think “9,210 pounds of weed? That’d last me at least a month!” Seriously guys, seek help.