Some attention-starved city councilman in New York has declared war on the city’s pigeon population, calling for fines for people who feed pigeons, as well as trained hawks to scare the birds away. Someone has clearly been watching too many Bush speeches. Personally, I’ve never had a problem with pigeons. I feel like we have an unspoken agreement, wherein I avoid chasing after them when they’re in parks, and they in turn avoid me when they decide to take a shit mid-flight. Seriously, it’s been over 20 years now that I’ve been walking on this earth and I’ve yet to be shit on. I’d say that’s a pretty good run.

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