Congrats (I guess) to the Class of 2007. When you’re walking across that stage in a few days, try not to think about the fact that you’re leaving paradise for a job that in no way validates the 17 years you spent in school. Also try not to fall. That shit will be on YouTube before you even get home.

Just remember graduates: in the real world, if you’re not cheating, you’re not trying. I plan on reminding the future WeatherSpouse of that on a nightly basis.

Thursday’s Forecast: After being told that the years final column was too emotional, the ‘human tries to learn how to be funny again by spending the entire summer watching “Norbit.”