“Jackass: The Movie”
Friday, Feb. 23, 1:20 a.m. – Officers observed a 19-year-old man stumble down Camino Pescadero and bump into a car, setting off its alarm. The subject then casually walked away, ignoring the deputies who witnessed the scene and were attempting to contact him.

As an officer approached the man and attempted to usher him to the curb, the man pushed him and fled northbound.

On the short run, the man tripped and fell – cutting up his hands in the process – yet quickly jumped back to his feet and continued. However, a deputy soon cornered him between a parked car and a house.

The man resisted arrest, struggling for several minutes before the officer pulled out his Taser, giving the flailing fugitive a chance to calm down before “momentarily relaxing” him with the device.

The man, stinking of booze and urine, was handcuffed and placed in the squad car where he asked the officers why they were so rough on him.

The officers explained that public intoxication and resisting arrest were not acceptable behaviors in Isla Vista. The man was transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where he was housed, pending sobriety.

“Jackass: Number Two”
Friday, Feb. 23, 1:20 a.m. – In a case related to the above, officers arrested an angry 20-year-old woman on the corner of Camino Pescadero and Trigo Road. As the deputies were cuffing the woman’s boyfriend, she began harassing and shouting at them, yelling, “Stay away from my boyfriend, stop doing that.”

The officers ordered the woman to leave the scene, and after she refused, a deputy escorted her away.

Seconds later, the wasted woman was back and ready to attack, yelling at the deputies and drawing a large crowd to the scene.

After taking her boyfriend into custody, the officers arrested the woman for interfering, delaying and obstructing an officer.

On the way to IVFP office, she slipped her right hand out of the cuffs and returned to ranting about the injustice of the justice system. Eventually, after some effort, the officers managed to cuff her again and she was transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where she was housed, pending sobriety.

Three Strikes You’re Out
Sunday, Feb. 24, 11:06 a.m. – Deputies walking eastbound on the 6700 block of Trigo Road saw a 20-year-old man ahead of them staggering down the street.

The subject was alone and unsteady when he fell against a parked truck and bounced back off of it. Reeling his body around, he began jogging down the street, directly at the deputies.

An officer stopped the man to check on his well-being and recognized the signs of intoxication including bloodshot, watery eyes and thick, slurred speech, accompanied by the ever-so-pleasant smell of alcohol.

The subject, who admitted to drinking “a couple shots of vodka,” told the officer he was on “Sabado Trigo,” assuring the deputy that he was fully cognizant of his surroundings.

The officer asked the man if he knew what day it was and the man said, “It’s about 2 a.m. right now, so 02-24.”

Being a little premature with his perception of time was the man’s second error. Strike three came when he admitted that he was visiting from Temecula and did not know where his friends lived or where they currently were.

The man was arrested for public intoxication and transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where he was housed, pending sobriety.