Are we just sitting around numbingly sucking everything into our souls that is being displayed by TV, magazines and celebrities? What happened to personal style truly meaning an original, personal style? And why do people just follow these trends without ever realizing why they choose to do these things? Here are some of the few trends I have noticed on campus that need to be put in their place:

1. Second-rate hand-cut jeans.

What happened here? OK, it was once an ultimate punk statement to have your thrift-store-bought jeans thrashed in ways that says fuck you to the “man,” while kicking him in the balls. But now, jeans are being sold with holes in them at ridiculous prices! Why would someone pay 80 bucks for jeans with massive holes in them? Yeah … just because. It seems to me that the holier your jeans are, the more street cred people give you. And the sizes of the holes these woman and men are cutting into their jeans are ridiculous, not to mention just plain second grade, amateur cutting skills. A very sad trend.

2. Big sunglasses.

Thank you, Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan for this one. The size of women’s sunglasses these days are enormous! I didn’t know looking like a fly was such the attractive, hot, sexy look. And yet, so many girls are doing it. Why? Because that is what celebrities are wearing right now. Big fucking sunglasses! It confuses the hell out of me. Bzzzz … whack!

3. Biking while talking on a cell phone.

Not only has driving while talking on the phone proved to be the popular form of transportation communication these days, but biking while talking on cell phones is an equally cool thing too. There is nothing like busting out a cell phone as you go dashing down trails on your bike, slowly trying to reach your psychology class. Cell phone bikers have a tendency to look like Ken and Barbie with a twist of a confused, crippled Lance Armstrong. But, ultimately, when I’m trying to get to class on time and there is a row of five bikers all swaying back and forth in front of me, playfully talking dirty with their lovers, all I can think of is barreling into them, hoping to shatter their flip phones into oblivion.

4. The Volcom look.

The guy who is trying to come off as the “I don’t care, I’m chill” guy is exactly what an entire wardrobe of skater clothes is trying to portray. Yet they, these Volcom guys, obviously do care because those clothes cost a dickload of money. These chill guys are spending massive amounts of money to look chill. What the fuck is that about? That’s not chill in terms of my wallet. Just be chill, don’t project your image to try and look chill because really you’re just as bad as the guy who “pops his colla.”

5. Pop-punk and reggae “stoner” music.

There is better music out there for you to explore. Put in the work and you will be rewarded. Trust me. KCSB (91.9 FM for most who don’t know) is the best radio station we have in this area. Listen to it. Stop looking towards MTV or Teen People reviews to give you the ultimate scoop on the music scene today. Get over your Bob Marley obsession, he is not as great as you may think he is – I said it.

I don’t pride myself on being “anti.” I do pride myself on trying to have character and meaning with my tastes and the fashion I wear. And you might say I am an outcast with no friends? Which might be true. And you will probably say I am an insecure, bitter punk who is trying to rain on everyone’s good time. This also could be true. And you probably denied and spat on everything I just wrote. Good, take a stand behind your fashion and actions. But when I see some of these trends at UCSB, I just start to feel embarrassed, annoyed and worried about how responsive young adults are to mainstream trends. To just conform to these trends, lacking knowledge or care for how we express ourselves, is just plain sad.

Andrew Sweat is a junior communications and film studies major.