I’m a well-intentioned Leftist intellectual with concerns about the environment. That said, the population of “wild” pigs in the Channel Islands should make good ham.

I have to say that I am disheartened by the ability of some people to oversimplify complex environmental issues. The Channel Islands Animal Protection Association (CHIAPA), or “Save the Pigs Foundation,” as they ought to be called, are rather naíve in their love for all of God’s creatures. “Wild” pigs are not native to the Channel Islands. In fact, they’re not native to the North American continent. Pigs were brought here by Europeans, whose progeny is usually to blame for most of the world’s environmental problems.

Pigs are hardly gentle creatures, as CHIAPA would have you believe. Just ask anyone who’s been gored by a wild pig. They’re also terrible for the local environment. Not only do they attract eagles to the Channel Islands — threatening the native fox population, they also cause major problems with soil erosion. Pigs like to root in the dirt and they’re almost as good as cattle at overgrazing and destroying local plant life. Pigs are good for one thing, though: sausages.

It’s time for us Lefties to gird up our loins and demonstrate that we aren’t just a bunch of limp-wristed idealists living in ivory towers.

Let’s go a huntin’.