The worst thing about writing this review is remembering the movie. I can honestly say that it would be a complete waste of your valuable time to even continue associating with this movie. That being said…

As a movie about Christmas released inexplicably close to Halloween, “Surviving Christmas” tells the story of a rich executive Drew (Ben Affleck), who, sick of spending Christmas alone, goes in search of his childhood home in order to rekindle the holiday spirit. Drew hires the family that already lives there to be his family. However, his stay ruins Christmas for this new brood.

Aside from cheeky incestuous jokes, this movie sucks. Affleck’s portrayal of over-excited Drew is so strained that it makes you uncomfortable even watching him. James Gandolfini, who plays the salami-eating father of this hired family, is a complete failure. He lacks the comedic timing that is necessary to pull off a role like this. The female lead, played by Christina Applegate, is just plain boring and lacks depth in her performance. Her character lacks any kind of believability. Nothing more can be or should be said of this character. The overall chemistry between the cast members also seems strained and uncomfortable. To say that the didn’t interact well would be an understatement. Director Mike Mitchell would have had a better shot of this being somewhat of a success if he had picked his actors more carefully.

Speaking of Mitchell, who also directed “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo,” his direction is mediocre at best. Considering that this is an unbearable film, the direction stands out. The different scenes fade into one another when transitioning. With a few predictable twists, this movie completely fails to deliver to the hype it created. The only redeeming parts of the movie were when Affleck’s character was physically hurt in some way. So, if you hate Ben Affleck, watch this movie. Overall, “Surviving Christmas” is a portrayal of the modern dysfunctional family during Christmas time. It would more likely kill you with boredom than help you survive the most wonderfully stressful time of the year.

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