Two days left, and I’m getting all emotional. The guy from I.V. Bakery called in response to yesterday’s box, offering 10 cents for every time I visited the store. Fuck the dimes! What I’m going to miss are those beautiful sandwiches and pastries! Gather up the dimes and buy one of my readers instead, then come out to my book signing so I can tell you how much I love you in person. I’ll try to resist the urge to lick your hands. That’s right, for all of you who ever wanted to ask me a question or throw explosives at me, a week from today is your chance. It will also be your only chance to obtain the Weather Reader through interesting trades.

Thursday’s forecast: Worthless autograph collectors mark their calendars: Next Thursday, high noon, in front of the Nexus.