You, your boozer friends and your shitty car just aren’t welcome, apparently.

As part of a plan to reduce the fun out-of-town revelers have in Isla Vista, Academic Senate Chair Walter Yuen proposed to eliminate weekend parking on campus. Yuen explained that without a place to park, nonresidents will simply turn their cars around and drive back to the ho-humbergs from which they came, leaving Del Playa open for those who live near it.

Oh, Walter. This is a bad, bad idea that shows no concern whatsoever for the students of UCSB. Had you and the rest of the Isla Vista Action Group given any thought to student welfare, you’d realize it’s not just out-of-towners who park on campus during the weekend; it’s people studying at the library, attending sporting events, visiting the computer labs and even working at such on-campus jobs as the Nexus.

Furthermore, there’s no data suggesting that many out-of-towners park on campus on weekends. Take a look on any given weekend. The lots are mostly empty. Presumably, the few out-of-town offenders caught by this proposed parking restriction would only be pushed into I.V., where they would take residents’ spaces.

But maybe the I.V. Action Group cares more about dampening others’ good times than helping students get an education. Since Yuen described the council as a “think tank advising Chancellor Yang,” maybe its members should have thought about some better alternatives to this turkey.

For instance, since the university already has a system of night and weekend parking passes in place, how about actually enforcing it? If the problem of out-of-towners in the parking lots is as bad as the group claims, the university would be rolling in moolah from all the citations it could issue on any given weekend. The university could even go out on a limb by charging for parking and making a profit off these partyers – who, honestly, will come whether they can park on campus or not. It would be a clever Band-Aid for a wounded university budget.

And finally, Yuen said, “We want to let outsiders know that if you’re not part of the community here, you’re not welcome to come party.” That’s just not true. Many students welcome their friends here every weekend.

It must be really hard to speak for us students, Walter, especially when you’re spitting in our faces. If you ever want students to view the I.V. Action Group and others like it as more than impotent killjoy committees, be sure to toss our welfare into that think tank.