My professor nearly put me into suspended animation today. As I listened to the drone of his voice, I could feel my blood sugar dropping and hear my heart rate begin to slow.

My eyelids started to droop. It was then that I noticed a peculiar phenomenon. The more I wanted class to be over, the more tired I became and the slower the clock ticked.

It was a nightmare. At this rate, would I ever be out of class? I had just begun to wrestle with this intriguing paradox when I woke up and realized that the next class was filing in.

Thursday’s forecast: Sleep deprivation with a twenty-five percent chance of stuff becoming randomly profound.