The international circus is in town, folks. You can catch the latest fantastically humorous developments every single day on any number of television channels. My personal favorite is CNN.

Yes, the ringleaders have begun the acts, announcing each with a glaring stupidity that must be tongue in cheek. Or so the most hope-filled among us think. Other, more cynical watchers can only listen to Rumsfeld and shake their heads as he calls for a military state. Or while he accuses countries left and right of involvement in a nefarious gang of evil-doers, called the Axis of Evil, that could only be the product of, well, the demented mind of Donald Rumsfeld.

That is perhaps the most disturbing part about the national scene: Each new development since the tragedy of 9/11 has been first announced by the Bush administration before any trouble even starts, with only one notable exception.

North Korea, after being lumped into this Axis of Evil, began its nuclear program again, citing a need for electricity. Which could be true, but not terribly likely.

Mr. Rumsfeld flashed onto the screen again this morning. He was talking about this new threat to America and what the latest intelligence had brought to light. North Korea, he said, has two nukes and enough material now for “six to eight more, which they will, of course, sell,” to terrorist organizations and other evil scum.

Yeah, he actually said, “of course.” What else would any small country with nuclear weapons do? Defend themselves against an already established nuclear terror group that refers to itself only as The Leaders of the Free World?

Nobody ever told Rumsfeld that silly little saying about assumptions. When you assume, you make an ass out of you and me. So apparently Rumsfeld is an ass now, and so are all Americans. If you don’t believe this, try doing some international traveling and tell everybody that you’re American.

North Korea’s trying to go nuclear, and nobody wants them to. The most convincing argument would probably be that no one in the world could possibly benefit from such action. Nuclear arms will – I’d like to say could here, but let’s not leave any conclusions unleapt to – be the death of the entire world, and nobody should ever use them.

But coming from an American, that’s total horseshit. The U.S. uses its nuclear arsenal on a daily basis – leaning on smaller countries that don’t have the kind of military we do, holding veto power in the U.N. because of it – our nuclear arsenal has proven absolutely indispensable on the international scene.

It’d be foolishness to think that other countries don’t see this. If you are nuclear in the global big top, then your opinion matters. North Korea, targeted directly as the enemy of the Free World, did the only thing that made sense for them. Actually, this is the first move on the international scene, other than anti-war sentiments rising among people the world over, that makes any damn sense at all when a government is put in context as the protectors of its people.

That’s not to say that the North Korean government is noble in any way. North Korea is in the grips of tyrannous leaders. And smart ones at that. They’re not being aggressive. They’re just grasping for the conch in the only way they can. Rumsfeld has shown them the only path, and now that they’ve taken it, he’s gonna get ’em for it. We’ll see whether the U.S. will buy a pre-emptive strike against “nuclear dealers.”

Daily Nexus Assistant Opinion Editor Cory Anthony only wrote this so everyone will think he watches the news.

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