Here Comes the Sun

There is a mathematical equation that defines laundry output in Isla Vista.

The more sun = less clothing worn.

This weekend was an endless parade of fishbellies, as skin was revealed on beaches for the first time in six months. I myself shed my weathercoat, only to transform my skin’s alabaster brilliance to a shade resembling Welch’s strawberry jam.

Tuesday’s Forecast: Scabbing and peeling.