A one-hit wonder waiting to happen. Sadly, for people who like power pop, Gwenmars is power poop that is going to get play on “alternative” radio. It fits the mold. The lyrics are written at an eighth-grade level, mostly songs about some girl named “She” who does, well, stuff. And then there are some songs about the future or something – it’s hard to tell.

The group tries very hard to sound edgy and aloof, but stealing Orgy’s guitar/keyboard riffs and Oasis’ vocals just doesn’t work. Note to Gwenmars: Fake Brit accents by California bands were cool in the ’90s, but now it’s just gross. When Gwenmars pays to play the Whiskey or Coconut Teaser, even the leathered drunks and coked-up skirted blondes whisper the word “generic.” Driving a Million would be comical if it wasn’t just a rip-off of Spacehog’s boring hit record back there in those glossy ’90s.

Smart money says these guys got into the biz for the money and chicks – they’re from L.A. after all. Don’t they know that rap-jock-rock is where it’s at? These puppy dogs are a waste of time. Like the Dead Kennedys said, “It’s like a bad laxative / It just don’t move me, you know.”