Sports
After ten non-conference matches to begin the season, the UCSB women’s soccer team prepares itself for the beginning of its conference schedule and a shot for the Big West conference title as it hos...
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Welcome back for another year at UCSB, and for new Gauchos, prepare for some of the most fun and exciting years of your lives. My name is Paul-Michael Ochoa (my friends call me P MO), and I am one of ...
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Last season, the UCSB women’s volleyball team finished second place in the Big West with a 19-12 record. After losing three seniors to graduation, the Gauchos will introduce a potential starting lin...
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With a roster consisting of 22 underclassmen, the UCSB women’s soccer team will try to overcome inexperience and rebound from last year’s disappointing last place Big West finish. While projected ...
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UCSB men’s soccer has set high expectations for its season in hopes of once again returning to the elite of college soccer. “It’s all about winning a national championship this year,” senior m...
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Confession: I almost went to UC Davis. Waiting until the very last possible day, I decided to attend UCSB somewhat unenthusiastically. My reasoning was that Santa Barbara, about an hour away from my h...
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My word doc yesterday was emptier than my bank account after a Thursday night downtown. For a solid four hours I just stared at it. What a crazy feeling. I’m writing to say goodbye to a school that ...
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If four years at UCSB has taught me anything, it’s that it’s incredibly awesome here and consistently exceeds your expectations, unlike the Miami Heat. Even superstar athletes who are too cool for...
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As I was preparing to write this column, getting the right font and indentation and all that, the enormity of the task before me hit me with full force. Writing a column for a school publication doesn...
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Andrew Checketts finished off his first year as head coach of the UCSB baseball team with a neutral .500 record, but in high fashion with a 3-1 mark during the last weekend series of the season. The s...
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As the end of the season approaches for the UCSB surf team, the Gauchos have just one more contest on the schedule: the National Championships, set for June 14 to 17 at Salt Creek Beach in Dana Point,...
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Four games in three days will close out the 2012 UCSB baseball season as the Gauchos travel to Bakersfield to take on Cal State Bakersfield and the University of Utah this weekend. A double-header aga...
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Falling short of winning the program’s first Big West title in its history, the UCSB softball team will add seven incoming players to next year’s squad in hopes that their athleticism and raw tale...
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As ironic as it is, the Saints aren’t exactly acting saint-like these days. It seems as if one charge or accusation after another is surfacing, each more shocking and damaging than the last. The Sai...
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After only one senior graduated from a team that finished tied for 10th in the MPSF, the UCSB men’s volleyball team brings in four standout recruits in hopes of getting back to postseason play. One ...
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A werewolf who definitely howled mid make-out
A performative male dressed as Tyler Durden
The mime that somehow made it hot and cool
The ghost of your situationship (no, it’s actually them)
Frat vampire, and your neck will be bleeding
The angel that has definitely never gone out
The literal devil
A prisoner with fake tattoos that you can pretend are real for the night
A sexy cowboy that definitely used the ride line at least four times
A Patrick Bateman who relates a little too much
The witch who asked for your zodiac sign first
A nurse who will leave you needing CPR
