It’s midterms, my dudes. You probably procrastinated and have some late nights ahead of you. So, if you are a dedicated student and hardcore Yerba supporter, consider these 10 alternative ways to get your Yerba fix. It’s time to ditch your mainstream ways because no one likes a basic bitch.
1. Tampon Plugging:
When you’re feeling like a slug, you know it’s time to plug, so give that Yerba tampon a snug vaginal hug.
Tip: For those who do not have a vagina, do not feel left out. You can insert a Yerba-soaked tampon into your anus.
2. Butt Chugging:
What are you waiting for? Put that shit in a funnel to get it in your tunnel.
Tip: Use anal beads or butt plugs often, so the funnel slides in real nice.
3. Snorting:
After taking too much up your rectum, look no further than your septum. Damage your nose, not your GPA!
Tip: Use a laminated bill (waterproof) or a shortened redvine.
4. Shooting Up:
If you’re looking to reboot, take the fast route and just shoot that hoot.
Tip: To all you premed students, help your friends shoot up. It’s a great way to practice placing an IV in patients.
5. Gummy Bears:
If you swear that you can no longer stare at your computer and you’re feeling in despair, then soak some gummy bears in Yerba and pop them if you dare.
Tip: Soak gummy bears in Yerba until they reach approximately the size of Chad and Brad’s dick.
6. Eyeballing:
Midterms shouldn’t make you cry, so dry your tears and drop some Yerba in your eyes — I promise, you’ll fly as high as the sky.
Tip: Use a child eyedropper for exceptional precision. If you cannot find one, pop over to the chem building and borrow a dropper.
7. Vapor:
Put down the rolling paper. Instead, inhale the Yerba vapor.
Tip: If you don’t have dry ice on hand to pour the Yerba over, you can #DIY and use your bike pump.
8. Shotgunning:
Your studying might not be done, but you can still have some fun and stun everyone in the library while you show off how you shotgun.
Tip: If you’re a real pro, you’ll ditch the keys and wolf bite instead.
9. Rub a Dub Tub:
If you shotgun, you may choke. So, if you feel like you’re gonna croak, sit in a tub of Yerba and just let it soak.
Tip: Be sure to bleach your tub beforehand. You don’t want the remnants from IV nights to mix with your Yerba.
10. Sipping:
If you don’t feel like caffeine tripping, you’re a pussy and you should focus on your sipping.
Tip: If this is how you choose to ingest your Yerba, reevaluate your life. You’re probably dull and universally forgotten.
nice