Nathan Campos / Daily Nexus

Nathan Campos / Daily Nexus

Around this time last year, our very own Assistant On The Menu Editor Collin McLeod resurrected absolutely horrific recipes from the past that would haunt your dreams. Most of which included a whole lot of mayonnaise. But why stop at just telling you about nasty recipes when you can have some fun and make your own? This year, I decided to take Collin’s article a step further and actually create one of the absurdities he resurrected: Russian Congealed Salad.

If you don’t know, Russian Congealed Salad is a marshmallow, mayonnaise, pineapple-filled gelatinous mound. After reading the list of ingredients, I was already scarred physically and emotionally, but I was not fully prepared for what was about to come; here at On The Menu, I suffer so you don’t have to.
Other than a few worried, side-eyed glances from my roommates, who probably thought I had lost my mind, this dish was more tolerable than I would have suspected. While it wasn’t the most pleasant-smelling dish I’ve made, I was expecting an overwhelming aroma of mayonnaise-infused gelatin that never quite hit.

You do, however, have to refrigerate your gelatinous monstrosity, and let’s just say my fridge needs a proper wash now with gallons of bleach. I truly believe this congealed salad wouldn’t be half-bad if the mayonnaise portion was taken away. Every other ingredient seems to go well together in my mind; the mayonnaise is the only item making me question the Russians.

Would I recommend making this? Only if you really want to traumatize your guests at your next Halloween party! If not, I would just stick to your ordinary caramel apples and white chocolate-dipped strawberry ghosts.
To make this sense-offending dish, I used a simple recipe I found at cooks.com. If you’re a brave soul and want to make this glorious dish, all you need is listed below!

Ingredients:

3/4 cups water
1 small pkg. lime Jell-O
1 small pkg. cream cheese
14 large marshmallows
20-ounce can of crushed pineapple, drained
2 medium bananas, sliced
1/3 cup mayonnaise
2 teaspoon lemon juice
1 cup chopped pecans

Directions:

1. Boil water and dissolve Jell-O.
2. Turn heat on low and add cream cheese and marshmallows.
3. Stir until dissolved.
4. Cool about 5 minutes and add remaining ingredients.
6. Put into 5 cup mold and refrigerate until firm.

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