As it turns out, baby’s first alcohol offense is only amusing until your school takes it upon themselves to tell your parents. So what if you’re over 21, fully able to drive yourself to court, and paying your ticket with the money you make serving coffee? You’re still a child under the law, and the law apparently thinks my parents still influence my decisions. The irony is that they would rather not know! We have this great “don’t ask, don’t tell” relationship, and you’re really kind of fucking it up, UCSB. So much for keeping up that charade, and thanks in advance for a silent
Thanksgiving dinner.