Sometimes my school days feel like a game of Candy Land. I draw a card and ride my bike, never knowing when (or if) I’ll make it to the Candy Castle (class). Hitting bike traffic is like landing on the Gooey Gumdrops space, and freshmen are sure to get lost in the Lollipop Woods (everywhere that is not DP). Queen Frostine Kappa Mu will try to recruit me into the Ice Cream Sea, and the Peanut Brittle House (the Arbor) will surely try to rip me off. Just before I get to class I have to pass The Molasses Swamp (the bike circle) where I can count on Gloppy and dirty bro-on-fixies to be out in full force.

Tomorrow’s Forecast: For the $12,500 that skateboard lane cost you’d think it could at least be rainbow colored.