Massage parlors in Indonesia are asking their female masseuses to make it clear that sex is not part of the massage by padlocking their skirts and pants.

Boooooooooo.

The best part of a massage is wondering if those strong yet soft hands are ever going to wander just a little bit down yonder. Further down, further down, flip a bitch, to the left a little… WHAMMY!

I don’t see this as a very smart economic move either. No one’s going to want to go to Indonesia anymore, unless, of course, the padlocks are penis shaped.

Tuesday’s Forecast: The ‘human gets a happy ending.