Throughout my years here at UCSB, professors and administrators have constantly told me that I am attending one of the “top universities in the country.”

While it’s true I can think of dozens of schools that top us in academics, I still hold pride in our unique community. I can rest in the fact that we are indeed a University of California, and merit respect for being such without trying. Unfortunately, I am constantly questioning the true nobility of our student body’s intellect every time I pick up a copy of the Nexus. There is a sincere A for effort to be won somewhere in the “normal” articles and findings, but I am becoming more and more disgusted by what the “Wednesday Hump” has turned into.

I learned about the “Wednesday Hump” from fellow dorm-mates in the paradise that was San Nicolas Hall Residence Hall back in 2004-05, and a guy named Dave Franzese wrote it. His articles left a little something to be desired, but there were some undoubted winners. Fast-forward to 2007, and all I’m reading about is how to give what this kid considers to be good oral sex. Really? Since when did our college newspaper turn into some archive for some trashy sex advice? I am as proud as the next person about UCSB’s well-earned, never-ending-party reputation. But I thought we were still intellectual UC students who could write something clever and actually significant to the world around us – students who could write about anything from our country to our Isla Vista community in an interesting and witty manner brimming with sexual innuendoes and sly comments. Instead, we are told by some random guy how he feels oral sex should be performed on a partner. And as a heads up: Use protection and don’t swallow without communicating with your partner about sexually transmitted infections and other concerns beforehand.

One of the best parts about a university newspaper is the freedom of content we have and lack of formalities we need to follow. But this shouldn’t translate into a complete void of standards. Yes, the Nexus is a direct reflection of the school and its body, but we can spare all the recent nonsense in the “Wednesday Hump” and still keep the reputation thriving. If anything, we’ll only come to be regarded more highly for actually balancing the festivities with a respectable amount of intellect. We are not as desperate as the “Hump” has been reflecting. I’m tired of feeling as though I’ve been let into the mind of some 14-year-old middle school student every time I read an article. And if dirty language is “colorful,” then stay inside the lines. It’s so unnecessary to use degrading language in every piece just because someone will actually print it now, as opposed to your high school’s monthly newsletter.

On top of the completely uncreative topics of the “Wednesday Hump,” it is written in a very unaesthetic and borderline offensive way. The 2007 Orientation issue gave the advice to “be careful what you stick your dick into. Or for that matter, what dicks and other objects you let get stuck inside of that cozy little object you ladies call a vagina.” (“Dorms Make for Good Sex,” Daily Nexus, Aug. 29) Wow. Of course your reasons and motivation for sex are personal and your own, but not everyone is doing it so casually – as a matter of fact, 20% of UCSB students abstain from sexual activity. Please spare us the rather un-poetic and degrading imagery that completely demeans a woman’s vagina, and maybe give a little more respect than just a “cozy little object” for something to get “stuck” in.

We call ourselves the University of Casual Sex and Beer only half jokingly, but hey – that’s us. It certainly is quite impressive that we are Princeton Review’s #10 top party school in the nation for 2008, but that doesn’t mean that we’ve drunk our brains into oblivion and don’t enjoy a good read every now and then. Or does it?