Where did all the hours in the night go? There hasn’t been much sleep, rest, relaxation or respite from the hungry wolves, which really is just a metaphor for midterms, papers and those annoying Apple commercials.

But in truth, a sudden melancholy has fallen over the ‘human, which can only be reasonably explained by global warming, sanctions on North Korea or David Horowitz coming to campus this week. Well, those reasons, and the whole thing about misery growing in the ‘human’s bosom like kudzu over the fields of America’s southern states.
Monday’s Forecast: Random freshman #34 dislikes today’s depressing Weather and looks for humor in other parts of the paper, all to no avail.