Alcohol, Vegetable or Mineral

Saturday, April 8, 12:25 a.m. – Officers walking through the intersection of Camino Pescadero and Del Playa Drive observed a 19-year-old man standing in a beach access way stumble and fall to the ground.

One of the deputies went to check on the subject’s welfare and found the man sprawled on the ground, drooling.

The officer approached the man and attempted to determine if he was injured and where he lived, but the subject answered every question with “I’m fine” and “I’m OK.”

The man eventually disclosed that he lived, “Over there,” at “1920 Del Playa.”

When the deputy asked the subject how much alcohol he had had to drink, the man said, “Guess.”

Not in the mood to play “20 Questions,” the officer observed that the man could not maintain his balance, smelled strongly of alcohol and showed other obvious signs of intoxication, and so he decided to place the subject under arrest for public intoxication.

The deputy handcuffed the man and sat him on the curb, but had to prop him up as the man constantly spit on the ground and continued drooling, unaware of his surroundings.

For his own safety and the safety of others, the man was transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where he was booked, pending sobriety.

Falling From Grace

Sunday, April 9, 1:32 a.m. – Deputies patrolling the 6600 block of Del Playa Drive watched as a 19-year-old woman stumbled into the street, ran into a car and fell into the gutter.

The officers watched as a second woman walked up to her friend and tried to help her up. The second subject proceeded to fall on top of her friend, and they lay wiggling in the street.

The deputy had to assist both women out of the gutter and to their feet. The officers spoke to the first fallen female, who admitted to drinking four shots of vodka and some other unknown drinks.

The officer asked the woman where she lived, and the woman replied that she lived in Francisco Torres Residence Hall.

She then told officers that the year was 2004, and assured them that she was fine to walk home.

For the woman’s safety, the safety of her friend and anyone else near the gutters, the deputies arrested both subjects for public intoxication.

The women were transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where they were booked, pending sobriety.

Fugheddaboudit

Sunday, April 9, 1:32 a.m. – Officers patrolling the 6600 block of Del Playa Drive watched as two women walked eastbound down the street while supporting a third woman.

The subject being carried subsequently slipped out of their arms and onto the ground. When an 18-year-old woman tried to help her up, that woman proceeded to fall to the ground on top of her friend.

The officer picked up the subject, assisted her to the sidewalk and leaned her against the fence.

The deputy asked the woman her age, and she told the officer she was eight. She then tried to correct herself, and said she was 21.

The officer asked the woman for her name, but she replied, “Don’t worry about it.”

The woman, who was only wearing one shoe, said she lived in “Torres” but couldn’t remember her room number.

The woman was arrested for public intoxication after she admitted that she had had “enough shots tonight,” and was transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where she was booked, pending sobriety.
– Compiled by Nikki Moore

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