Stop the presses! Free pizza’s are being given out at Dominos! This is the greatest thing to hit Isla Vista since that crazy guy on the corner started telling us the world is coming to an end.

Wednesday’s forecast: The world really does come to an end after the ‘human eats too much pizza and explodes, covering all of Isla Vista in a thick, sticky layer of weatherfat. But hey, at least the ‘human now has enough credit cards to buy out the pope.