Some woman supposedly found part of a human finger in her bowl of Wendy’s chili. Isn’t it weird how people are always finding toes and chicken heads and razors and shit in fast food? What’s weirder to me, though, is that people complain about it. That human finger was probably far more nutritious — and tasty — than the chili would have been.

Friday’s forecast: Well, I don’t know if she ate the finger. Maybe she drank it instead.

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