If you’re involved in fund raising for an organization, A.S. is prepared to help you fuck it all up. Finance Board – which is currently broke – will hold a workshop tomorrow to teach you how to “create and sustain your financial success.” It’s kind of like going to Ronald McDonald for dieting tips; he’ll smile and clown around, but, unless you believe in magic, it’ll be death by heart attack by age 40.

Tuesday’s forecast: Finance Board, which does believe in magic, teaches you how to make money appear from thin air.