I don’t mean to be a downer, but I’ve been finding it damn hard to get in the joke telling mood lately. Do you see the headlines on this page? Or the ones that led up to them? The news page is like a fucking Chia Pet, getting uglier every day, but spouting blood instead of that green clown hair.

At least the Lakers won. Some people say sports are pointless, but so is the torture-a-thon on the news page. And basketball is fair and nobody dies.

Wednesday’s forecast: Unless someone gets in Shaq’s way on a fast break.