Llello on Abrego

On Friday, Nov. 14, Isla Vista Foot Patrol officers on bicycle patrol saw a 17-year-old woman walk out of the breezeway of an apartment complex on the 6700 block of Abrego Road.

Breezeway Betty approached two 20-year-old male companions and the three of them began walking eastbound. Betty repeatedly tried to hand something to Companion #1, but he gave her the cold shoulder and kept walking. Betty turned around, saw the fuzz, leaned to her left and dropped the object she had just tried to pass off to Companion #1.

Assuming that Breezeway Betty did not forget to sew the holes in her purse, the officers biked up to the group and detained all three. One officer scoped the sidewalk and found a plastic bag full of a suspicious white powder. Breezeway Betty was arrested for possession of a controlled substance.

Companion #1 told officers that he and Companion #2 wanted to get $20 of cocaine for the night and Breezeway Betty had told them she knew where to get hooked up. He admitted to giving $20 to Betty for the coke he planned to split with his friend and that he had refused to take the bag from Betty because he saw the cops.

Breezeway Betty told police that she does not use cocaine anymore, and that she was just helping out her friends. Betty said she knows the man she bought the cocaine from as “Frankie” and does not know what his apartment number is.

Betty was released to her father, who told police that this is the third time Betty has been arrested and that she has a cocaine problem.

DP Piss Capades

On Saturday, Nov. 15, IVFP officers patrolling the 6600 block of Del Playa Drive observed a 23-year-old man urinating along a fence in plain view.

The officers observed the numerous amounts of people and cars passing by on the roadway and figured Pissing Peter was too drunk to care for his own safety. Peter at least had the courtesy to zip up his pants when the officers contacted him.

Pissing Peter had bloodshot eyes, slurred speech and unsteady balance – all the side effects of a Saturday night in Isla Vista. When the officers asked Pissing Peter to assess his level of drunkenness, Peter admitted to drinking “a lot.”

Peter was arrested for public intoxication and taken to the county jail, and fenced in pending sobriety.

It Just Grew Legs and Walked Into My Car…

On Saturday, Nov. 15, officers investigating a report of a person vomiting on cars on the 6600 block of Abrego Road found another group of suspicious suspects.

The officers heard a car start and then turn off right away. When no one got out of the car, officers figured they had been spotted and approached the vehicle.

When the driver rolled the window down, a plume of smoke came from inside the car occupied by three men, aged 18, 19 and 20. The smoke smelled like marijuana. When asked if everything was all right, the driver told the officers that everything was fine.

The officer told Stoney Steve he smelled cannabis. Steve opened his center console and showed the officer a plastic bag and the green goodies it held inside. The officer asked Stoney Steve if he had anything else in the vehicle he should know about, to which Steve replied that he was not sure.

Determined to refresh Steve’s memory, the officer asked him how the three of them had been puffing the pot. Stoney Steve remembered that they had used a pipe, but surprisingly could not remember where the pipe was.

The three suspects got out of the vehicle to so the officers could search the car and their pockets. Although the guys’ Levi’s didn’t yield any results, a pipe was found on the floorboard under the front passenger seat and a cloth bag full of psilocybin mushrooms was hiding in the rear pocket of the passenger seat.

The officer approached the Blazin’ Threesome and asked who the shrooms belonged to. At first, no one answered, but Stoney Steve finally admitted they were his. Steve told the officer that a friend from Bakersfield had brought the shrooms with him the previous weekend and must have left them in the car on accident.

Even though he told officers that he never used shrooms, only weed, Stoney Steve was arrested for possession of a controlled substance.

Field of Crushed Dreams

On Sunday, Nov. 16, an IVFP officer saw a 16-year-old girl passed out in a field near the intersection of Trigo Road and Camino del Sur.

Yvonne Youngster wasn’t just in the grass near the sidewalk, either. She was approximately 15 feet from the road in the middle of the field. There were several people standing and kneeling around her.

When they saw the officer approaching, Youngster’s friends attempted to help her by pulling her to her feet, but inadvertently made the situation worse by pulling her shirt up and exposing her breasts to the officer in the process. The officer helped the group get Yvonne to the sidewalk where she could sit down.

Because Youngster had vomit on her pants and could not keep her head up, the officer decided to ask her friends exactly what had happened. An 18-year-old woman identified herself as Youngster’s sister and said Yvonne did not have that much to drink, but this was her first journey into the wonderful world of alcohol consumption.

The elder Youngster pleaded with the officer to let Yvonne go and promised that they would go straight to yet another sister’s house on Pasado Road. Yvonne was staying at the third sister’s apartment with her grandmother.

The officer asked the elder Youngster if Granny and Big Sis knew where the nearly comatose Yvonne was. Elder Youngster said she was not sure. The officer explained that because Yvonne Youngster was not able to care for her own health, he would have her arrested for public intoxication and taken to the hospital for treatment of alcohol poisoning, and then she would have to go to a juvenile penitentiary.

Instead of spending the night with the other bad kiddies, Yvonne was released to her grandmother, who agreed to house her at home, pending sobriety.

Piss Capades: the Sequel

On Sunday, Nov. 16, an officer on the 900 block of Embarcadero del Norte observed a 21-year-old man urinating in an open parking lot.

When contacted by the officer, Urination Urich made certain to finish his business before turning around to answer any questions. The officer asked Urich for identification so he could write up a citation for urinating in public. Urich said he could not provide any form of identification, even though his wallet was protruding from his back pocket.

Urination Urich said he was from out of town, but could not remember where he was planning on sleeping for the night. Then he told the officer once more that he did not have his I.D. and asked if he could just leave without a citation.

Not in a particularly generous mood, the officer not only refused this request but arrested Urich for public intoxication because he could not remember where he was staying or where he put his wallet, let alone care for his own safety. He was taken to that popular, albeit pricey, motel for tourists to Isla Vista – the county jail – where he was housed, pending sobriety.