I went to a movie last night and determined that the average filmmaker has no respect for the finite capacity of the human bladder…
Unless the concept of “more bang for your buck” directly relates to a massive spontaneous failure of the kidneys, two and a half hours is just too long.
Thursday’s forecast: Seventy-five percent chance of the large Coke catching up with me before they roll credits.
Do: Practice being respectful. Don’t: Get caught up saying yes to all the Arbor's tablers.
Do: Grab a coffee at Cajé. Don’t: Scooter to Campbell Hall.
Do: Self-reflection. Don’t: Wear flip-flops to your 9 a.m. class.
Do: Go to CLAS. Don’t: Keep spending money at Freebirds.
Do: Watch a peaceful Campus Point sunrise. Don’t: Slap your ex on DP.
Do: Give a new coffee spot a chance. Don’t: “Sleep through” your 8 a.m. class. Again.
Do: Take a moment to breathe. Don’t: Flake on your Hinge date.
Do: Use your dining hall plan. Don’t: Scroll through GauchoGuys during lecture.
Do: Visit your TA. Don’t: Use Thriftopia as an excuse to binge spend.
Do: Start applying to internships. Don’t: Hook up on campus.
Do: Bow down to Chancellor Yang when you see him. Don’t: Fall off your bike.
Do: Pick up the Daily Nexus. Don’t: Ignore your parents’ texts.
