Don’t carry weapons on your costume, fake or real. Halloween’s the time to have fun and give a good scare, but no one should have to get hurt.
If you do decide on a costume that reveals as much skin as possible, remember to bring a jacket. Nipple chafe is never fun the morning after.
Don’t invite your friends. The charm of an Isla Vista Halloween comes from the locals, not the jackasses from out of town.
Do be nice to the kids. A lot of families live in I.V., which means a lot of children are out experiencing Halloween for the first time.
Don’t try to take a picture of the cops. While it may seem like a good idea at the time, Mom and Dad really don’t need that letter from the university.
Do take your picture with Chancellor Yang. He goes out into I.V. every year to mingle with the students. Take a snapshot to remember the administrative magic.
Don’t dress as either an angel or a devil. If you feel the need, at least wear panties along with your halo and wings.
Do wrap your ghost in a sheet and make sure all lovin’ commences with sober consent on both sides. Costumes and booze doesn’t mean you have to be stupid.
Don’t expect any music. Halloween is a fun time, but I.V.’s still suffering from the reputation it got 10 years ago. Thanks a lot, Playboy.
Do go to D’a de los Muertos. I.V. nights may be fun but they aren’t everything. Next Thursday and Friday will be a time for everyone in I.V. to unwind.
Do let yourself go. Our news editors can always use the better stories for our police blotter.
Do wake up on Nov. 1 and scour the streets for all the things the drunkards and idiots let fall out of their pockets the night before. You’ll be amazed at what you can find.