Saturday, Sept. 28, 2:15 a.m.: Isla Vista Foot Patrol officers patrolling the 6500 block of Del Playa Drive observed a 22-year-old man walking with a group of people in the middle of the street while carrying a red plastic cup.
The officers contacted the suspect and asked him what was in the cup. The suspect told the officers it was “Citron and 7-Up.” The officers smelled the liquid and confirmed it was indeed alcohol and soda. When the officers asked the suspect for identification, he reached into his pocket and pulled out several cards, dropping a few of the cards on the ground.
After shuffling through the cards, the suspect finally handed the officers an identification card from El Camino College. When asked by the officers how much he had to drink, the suspect said, “Six or seven beers and the Citron and 7-Up.”
The officers told the suspect they were going to issue him an open container of alcohol in public ticket. The suspect smiled and said, “Can’t we discuss this? What if I do 50 push-ups right now? Will you call it even and let me go with a warning?” The officers told the suspect that that was not an option, at which point the suspect began to get upset.
The suspect told the officers that he had no money and could not afford the ticket. The officers told the suspect they were going to issue him the citation and he could discuss his financial situation with the judge. The suspect began to display signs of intoxication. The officers would explain to the suspect why he was getting the citation and moments later the suspect would ask again why he was being issued the ticket.
After the officers were finished writing up the citation, they handed it to the suspect along with a pen and asked him to sign it. A woman with the suspect grabbed the citation and pen out of his hands and told him not to sign anything.
The officers took the citation back from the woman and handed it to the suspect, asking him again to sign the citation. The suspect continued to say, “Forget about the ticket and just give me a warning.” The suspect refused to sign the citation.
The officers warned the suspect that they would count to five and if he did not sign the ticket by five, they would arrest him for public intoxication. The officers counted to five, but apparently the suspect couldn’t count that high and continued to refuse to sign the ticket. He was placed under arrest for public intoxication, issued a drinking in public citation and transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail, where he should have been given Sesame Street’s “Fun With Numbers” picture book.
Sunday, Sept. 29, 12:13 a.m.: IVFP officers patrolling the 6600 block of Trigo Road noticed a 20-year-old man sitting on a crate with his head down asleep. The suspect was wearing a sweatshirt with the hood pulled over his head and face.
The officers contacted the suspect and asked him how he was doing. The suspect looked at the officers and told them he was trying to use his cellular phone to call “JosŽ.” The suspect then attempted to use his phone. The officers asked the suspect to stop using his phone and talk to them. The suspect ignored the officers three times.
When the officers asked the suspect to stand, he stumbled and lost his balance. The suspect was arrested for public intoxication and transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail. As of press time, there’s been no word from JosŽ.
The Nexus Gets Mushy
Sunday, Sept. 29, 12:34 a.m.: IVFP officers patrolling the 6500 block of Del Playa Drive noticed a 20-year-old woman stumbling alone in the street, bumping into parked cars.
When the officers approached the woman, they noticed she had a strong odor of alcohol on her breath and person. At first the suspect refused any information and later while in the IVFP office she only gave her name and date of birth. The suspect was arrested for public intoxication and transported to the Santa Barbara County Jail.
Our dedicated police report readers may be asking themselves why this particularly unfunny report made this week’s cut. Well, this report has a certain sentimental connection to the Daily Nexus because this particular suspect once came in to write a story for the Nexus two years ago. Unfortunately, she got so drunk the night her assignment was due that she called from in front of the UCen and asked where Storke Tower was. The suspect was fired immediately. A couple years older and none the wiser.
-Compiled by Jennifer B. Siverts from the Isla Vista Foot Patrol Reports