Artsweek wanted to do a pre-write for brilliant/hilarious Satirist Neal Pollack urging people to attend his upcoming book tour stop in Santa Monica on March 26th, but pre-writes are boring and tedious.
Instead, Artsweek used its professional training and deep-cover sources of college entertainment journalism to uncover the following triple-stamped, uber-Top Secret CIA communiqu
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“dusty rusty crusty musty ass california hills”
“frowning in plaid (haunted radios, bird bones + anthropomorphized wind)”
“warming my hands on bridges i’ve burnt”
“songs that make me see god”
“My Playlist #236”
“classy wine moment and intellectual conversation”
“90s heroin chic model off duty”
“tweet tweet bird emoji map emoji”
“not my circus, not my monkeys”
“a grave is probably cheaper than an apartment”
“ATE THESE BITCHES LEFT NO CRUMBS / DID IT IN DESIGNER PUMPS”
