Brittany Nguyen / Daily Nexus

With parent’s weekend having just passed, we know the reality has hit that you have no clue what to do when parents come visiting. Fear not: Nexustentialism is here to help. And, never one for an unvetted story, we’ve tested each of these on writer Emma Demorest’s actual mom. Here’s what she had to say about it.

1. The beach

One of our most prominent boasting points, the beaches of UCSB are a fantastic place to take any visitor. Head to Anacapa or Sands and let your mom experience the beauty of nature that surrounds you.

Emma’s mom gives it: 4/5

“Oh how nice! What’s that sm- Is that man over there smoking marijuana? In the day? I don’t think that’s allowed.”

2. Buddha Bowls

There is no better way to show your mom some of the awesome culinary experiences in Isla Vista than taking her to Buddha Bowls, where she’ll say things like, “Oh!” and, “What a fun idea.”

Emma’s mom gives it: 3/5

“You’re right it is good, but you’re eating this how often? I don’t know, it’s just a lot of bread for your body to digest. And you said they don’t do salad? Maybe you should double check.”  

3. I.V. Drip

One of the best-known dessert spots in Isla Vista, I.V. Drip is the perfect place to get your parent’s sweet tooth on, full-throttle. It’ll be like the time they took you to get ice cream when you were little. Wow, full circle.

Emma’s mom gives it: 3/5

“I just wanted a single scoop of plain sorbet. I don’t understand why they can’t manage that.”

4. Your friend Devon’s house with all the weed

Though not ideal, Devon’s house will give your mom an almost too realistic idea of how UCSB students actually live. It was nice for Devon to invite you guys over for the game’s after party, and even though your mom insisted you tag along, you’re not sure how she’s taking all the empty budweiser bottles stacked up on Devon’s mantle or all the crushed food in his living room carpet.

Emma’s mom gives it: 4/5

“ Well these kids sure do like to have a good time. And you say this stuff is medicinal? “

5. Kappa Eta Sigma’s rager

Nobody expects to take their mom to one of the biggest frat parties of the year, but sometimes you can’t really control where the night will go. In what will inarguably be the best bonding experience the two of you will ever share, don’t be afraid to dance your hearts out, make out with some hot pieces of meat and have an all-around great night. You mom will tell her friends about the best parent’s weekend ever.

Emma’s mom gives it: 5/5

“I slapped the bag!!! This reminds me of my study abroad during Oktoberfest!!! Everyone here is so nice!!! Emma don’t touch that, use my hand sanitizer first; you don’t know where that’s been.”

Emma Demorest and Emma’s mom want YOU to bring your mom to I.V.

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