Isla Vista Foot Patrol officers narrowly missed an opportunity to reenact their favorite Bay Watch scene this weekend when an inebriated male loudly proclaimed he would brave the icy waters near the Camino Pescadero beach entrance.

At approximately 1:16 a.m. Monday morning, Sheriff’s deputies responded to a 9-1-1 call from two females concerned for their friend’s welfare. According to witness reports, the 19-year-old male said he was going for a quick dip in the Pacific. However, his friends’ reported they were confident he did not know how to swim and forgot his floaties at home.

After arriving on the 6500 block of Del Playa, officers attempted to prevent the subject from going down to the beach and escort him back to a securely landlocked patrol car. However, the aquatics enthusiast resisted officers’ attempts to shepherd him away from the sea, proclaiming his desire to “look at the offshore oil rigs”.

Officers reported the subject’s decibel level rarely dropped below shouting volume. Despite the risk of ruptured eardrums, IVFP learned from the would-be-merman he had consumed “about 4 beers” after suffering estrangement from his significant other.

IVFP eventually managed to get the subject into a patrol car. The wannabe Phelps was booked for public intoxication.