UCSB freshman Haywood Jablomi announced Thursday that he deserved to get into Berkeley and will attempt to transfer next year.

Jablomi told reporters he never wanted to come to Santa Barbara, and if it weren’t for his S.A.T. score he would have gotten into UCB. The announcement came after thinking about money during spring break, when Jablomi realized the name of a famous school could make him rich later in life.

“I want to go to medical school, and I want to get my degree at a school that everyone knows is for really, really smart people, like Berkeley,” Jablomi said. “I’m not like most people. I read.”

Jablomi says his attending UCSB was a mistake. After playing drums in a band, running for the track team one semester of his sophomore year in high school, and getting “pretty much dope-ass” grades, Jablomi said he expected to attend Berkeley.

His expectations were dashed when the school rejected him last April.

“It wasn’t right that I didn’t get in,” Jablomi said. “I mean, I did fuck up my S.A.T., but I didn’t study at all for it, so my 1050 shows how smart I actually am.”

Jablomi will apply for transfer later this year, and said he will certainly get into Berkeley now because his GPA is the highest it has ever been.

“My grades are actually really good, because a C is average,” Jablomi said. “So C’s and some B’s put me above the curve.”

Contacted by reporters while lying on the beach, Jablomi said UCSB’s environment isn’t for him.

“I don’t like it here,” Jablomi said, surrounded by women in swimsuits and with a beer resting on his surfboard. “It sucks.”

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