The single redeeming value of “Legion” is that it only takes itself half seriously. Unfortunately, neither half really merits watching.
Let’s run through the plot: When God loses faith in humanity (again), he sends all his angels to do his dirty work. But to seal the deal, the angels must first kill a pregnant young woman in New Mexico whose unborn child is mankind’s last hope. How do we know this? The fallen archangel, Michael (Paul Bettany), told us.
Now, I don’t know if the writers of this movie ever saw “Terminator,” but the concept is sickeningly similar. But who’s the human meant to help momma here? A hick named Jeep (Lucas Black), son to a diner owner (Dennis Quaid).
While the concept was interesting, albeit a little ripped off, the execution was downright terrible. If the film wanted to make fun of itself, the best route would not have been so half-assed. Rather, characters like the old woman who turns out to be a possessed, ceiling-crawling creature would have been way less awkward to watch; attempts to provoke frightened screams resulted instead in hysterical fits of laughter.
Ignoring the obvious stupidity of so many people being stranded in the same middle-of-nowhere spot, I don’t know about you, but I’ve never heard of exploding boils boasting acidic spray that results in a person’s death. Also, a hook-handed diner cook? Really?
Tyrese Gibson (yes, really) turns in a decent performance as the clichéd tough-but-sensitive gangster, but there is a limit to how many times you can have a character utter phrases like “shorty” and “foo'” before you start to sound downright racist.
The film’s poor editing doesn’t help matters, either: The film is full of choppy scene shifts and gaping plot holes. We never learn how the child will help humanity, nor is the film ever satisfyingly resolved. Nothing is explained — not even the important stuff.
Probably a result of relying too heavily on its crazy characters, the film loses its plot and doesn’t try hard enough to make any kind of statement on humanity or religion.