It occurs to me that people are all atwitter about this presidential election thing. In the spirit of democracy and voting, I decided to conduct a poll of all Nexites to find out which NFL team will win the Super Bowl. Then I thought about how much of a hassle it would be and how little I value my colleagues’ uneducated opinions on the matter and I decided to “G-Dub it” and go unilaterally.
First and foremost, isn’t it nice that the Patriots suck? Seriously, with Tom Brady out, the rest of this decidedly mediocre league can battle it out to determine some kind of sub-champion. It’s like how any golfer who wins anything while Tiger Woods is out should have an asterisk by his title: “This year doesn’t really count.” It’s somewhere on the significance scale between a players’ strike year and any hockey season.
But I digress. The point I was going to make before is that even while this year isn’t particularly important or relevant, I’m still happy to see the Patriots getting walloped by the Dolphins, all the while starting a guy who hasn’t been in charge since high school.
And what about the Aaron Rodgers-led Packers? Weren’t they good last year? But I feel like they had a different quarterback then… if only I could remember who it was. Why won’t ESPN report on that guy more anyway? Whatever, they’re pretty OK this year I suppose.
The Manning Bros. are always a good bet, but the older, better one kind of has a run-of-the-mill team this year. And while the younger one may have won the Super Bowl last year, I can’t really see the Giants starting an NFL dynasty. They’re not that good.
The Cowboys, Saints and Chargers are underperforming their way out of contention. The Bills and Titans are upstarts, but they’ll probably taper out once the season wears on.
As for local-ish teams in the western divisions, there are officially two of eight with winning records. The Cardinals and Broncos are those teams, with each of them sitting at 4-3. Yeah. At least the west doesn’t contain the league’s worst two teams: Cincinnati and Detroit. Amazing cities merit fittingly amazing teams.
So who will climb out of this sinkhole we call the NFL and claim the crown in Tom Brady’s absence? I can’t think of any team that deserves it. No really, I don’t think I can bring myself to make a prediction.
Not like it matters though. By February, we’ll all be getting stoked for March Madness anyway.