The QB’s favorite thing is when foreign dudes lie about their ages. If I were the Astros I’d rip up his contract and send him to play in Antarctica.
It’s not polite to ask a lady that.
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Aries
March 21 - April 19
“24K Magic” by Bruno Mars
Taurus
April 20 - May 20
“folklore” by Taylor Swift
Gemini
May 21 - June 20
“Jagged Little Pill” by Alanis Morissette
Cancer
June 21 - July 22
“Graceland” by Paul Simon
Leo
July 23 - August 22
“25” by Adele
Virgo
August 23 - September 22
“The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill” by Lauryn Hill
Libra
September 23 - October 22
“WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO?” by Billie Eilish
Scorpio
October 23 - November 21
“Falling into You” by Celine Dion
Sagittarius
November 22 - December 21
“Harry’s House” by Harry Styles
Capricorn
December 22 - January 19
“Babel” by Mumford & Sons
Aquarius
January 20 - February 18
“Random Access Memories” by Daft Punk
Pisces
February 19 - March 20
“Golden Hour” by Kacey Musgraves
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