A schoolteacher in Los Angeles has added a brand-new task for her students: Bug Monitor. Teacher Melodie Conrad said that there is just too much violence in society, and she doesn’t want her students to be a part of that. She wants to teach them compassion and understanding for other living things, including bugs.

The bug monitor’s job is to pick up bugs that trespass in the classroom and take them outside without harming them. Conrad’s students were initially hesitant, but have now hopped on board. Student Rebecca Tokofsky said she’s pretty pumped about the idea, “even though sometimes it’s creepy.”

I thought this bug safety thing sounded ridiculous at first, because seriously, who cares if I step on a stupid Daddy Long Legs? But I understand that there is a bigger lesson of peace and kindness going on in the classroom, and I’m down with that.

Do you know who is actually ridiculous? Daniel Marlos, who said that bugs are “prone to unnecessary slaughter.” He started a website link that helps people distinguish nice bugs that people should live with from mean bugs that are okay to kill. The site also teaches tolerance on all levels… by telling people not to kill bugs. So the way to eliminate racism and sexism is by encouraging people to not squash that cockroach in the kitchen? Right.

Of course, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, in its never-ceasing quest to find any semi-living thing to protect, thinks these bug monitor and bug protection concepts are great ideas. PETA even went out of its way to give Conrad a Compassionate Teacher Award. Awwwwww.

Screw all of this. Like I said before, bugs make for a scrumptious meal, so pick those spiders up off the ground and fry ’em up for your roommates. I swear they’ll love you forever.