If for some reason you want to leave beautiful Santa Barbara for a weekend, Rosarito, Mexico is a great place to go party. Rosarito is like heaven to a college student because of its seemingly lawless atmosphere and cheap thrills. Like a mother bird passes food to its delicate babies, I will now regurgitate some of my experiences to you.

The location of Rosarito is a little far from Santa Barbara and driving there can take about 6 hours, but if you can find enough people, the better way to do it is take a party bus. It takes about 8 hours, but then you can all get so wasted on the way down that you black out – or as I like to call it, “time travel.” Another issue regarding the location is that the United States now requires a valid passport for reentry. If you can figure out the transportation and passport issues, the trip is well worth it.

Cheap booze in itself is a great reason to travel to Rosarito. Most of the main clubs offer alcohol at prices comparable to that of State Street’s clubs – however there are many smaller, less touristy bars with beers and shots for a dollar. Alcoholic adventurers can also find rare and powerful liquors such as Absinthe and Pulque, which is Mexican moonshine.

Upon arrival, there are many fun and cheap activities to try. All Terrain Vehicles, or ATVs, can be rented for about $20 an hour. At Club Iggy’s you can stumble onto the beach, scribble something that looks like a signature on a piece of paper, and ride ATVs along the coast. A few friends and I staggered to the beach to investigate this cheap deal. Most of us were too drunk to realize what was going on, so one guy signed for all of us, and we rode off at full speed with beers in hand. Unfortunately, two of my buddies crashed and the ATV owners took away their keys and yelled at them. I would suggest remaining somewhat sober so you don’t die while tearing up the beach.

ATVs aren’t for everyone, but a safer alternative is renting horses. You can rent a horse for about the same price and ride along the shore with a loved one, or a cheap hooker you find on the streets. Speaking of cheap hookers, there are plenty of those, if you are into that sort of thing. I don’t think there is a distinction between stripper and hooker in Mexico, so be careful if you go to a strip club while intoxicated – you may end up getting an unexpected hand job from Lucy.

The nightlife is even better. The two main clubs there are Papas & Beer and Club Iggy’s. Papas & Beer is noted for its huge volleyball court and mechanical bull, while Club Iggy’s often has foam parties and open bar nights. Wherever you party, watch out for the guys that walk around with whistles and pour tequila or Jell-O shots in your mouth. After they fill your mouth with a watered down shot they will try and charge you at least $5 without telling you. Another club that is not quite as popular but amazing if you have a large group is the Club Maya. It is all white, brand new and offers a Jacuzzi in the middle of the club.

If you go out and party at night, make sure you stay in groups so the locals don’t try to fuck with you when you’re drunk. A girl in our group wandered off a few feet, was kidnapped and forced to drive around with some seedy characters in a van for an hour, but luckily convinced the people to return her.

Rosarito is a great place to vacation for a weekend. If you are careful, or just dumb and lucky in my case, you will be safe and have a fun time. Enjoy the relaxed law enforcement. Go to a fireworks stand and buy illegal dynamite and blow up trashcans. Go to a bar and buy a bucket of Coronas for a buck a piece. Try to meet a cutie visiting from San Diego and take him/her back to your hotel, and if that fails, a little bartering and $40 can get you anything you want at a strip club.

Daily Nexus columnist Ray Collins also found that offering your dick in a box buys a decent hooker at a strip club, too.