Whenever I venture out and about in Isla Vista, I make sure to have a small supply of condoms on me. Contrary to what Melissa Davis would have you believe in her article (“Skip the Pickup Line,” Daily Nexus, April 17), I am not promiscuous and I am not a desperately horny guy. I don’t expect to have sex every night either. I carry condoms so I can be better prepared to make good decisions if my night takes a turn for the sexy.
Davis unfairly stereotypes guys as only caring about getting into girls’ pants. Not every man in I.V. who carries condoms on him is trying, or expecting, to have sex with you right then, right there. As for me, I’ve always liked being prepared for the unexpected. In elementary school, I was that kid who always carried the biggest pack of Crayolas in my backpack. You know, just in case the subtle coloring of the rainbow I was drawing required more than five shades of purple.
When I have condoms on me, I feel at ease. I don’t necessarily carry them for myself, either. I carry them for friends or whoever else I run into that may need them. I carry them for the embarrassed girls I see buying pregnancy tests at the liquor store I work at. I carry them for the students that come in to Student Health with an unexpected STI. Carrying condoms does not mean that you think of yourself as a stud or sexual dynamo or that you must be easy or slutty. It’s a sign of someone who is mature and responsible about his or her sexuality. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently.
Davis also mentions that she hates being accused of “leading someone on” because of her friendliness earlier on in the encounter. This brings me to my next point, the importance of communication. Good communication is crucial to any good sex session, date or relationship. If Davis had effectively communicated her wishes to remain abstinent with the person in her piece, the issue of her being offended by the pick-up line would not have even been an issue. Come on, who takes pick-up line seriously anyway? “Are those space pants? Because that ass is out of this world!” Give me a break. I have never in my life seen or experienced one that actually worked. In fact, I would much prefer hearing, “I have a condom.” You have a condom? Fantastic! I just learned a little more about your sexual maturity and quite frankly, I am a little turned on. Davis’s piece did bring up how important it is to communicate your feelings with your partner about the relationship, past sexual history, how far you are willing to go, or protection issues before you do anything sexual. Like carrying condoms, it’s all a part of sexual responsibility.
Another issue I have with Davis’s opinion piece was her assertion that most sexual experiences in Isla Vista are coupled with drug and alcohol use. I would like to point out that 22 percent of UCSB students abstain from drinking alcohol and having sex. Davis’s generalization of the Isla Vista community is both irresponsible and misleading. People definitely do have responsible sex in Isla Vista. If you are interested in free condoms, the Sex and Relationship Interns will be passing out 1,000 condoms on the night of May 12 on Del Playa for our popular “Condom Alert” night. Feel free to walk up to the sexy people dressed in orange for free condoms and instructions for proper use. Also, be sure to check out the Sex Affair on May 17 on the Women’s Center lawn for cool information about sex and relationships, great prizes and pictures with our human penis and vagina.
I have a condom. You should have a condom. Good for me. Good for you.
Cassie Chavez is a sophomore political science major and a Sex and Relationships Intern.