It’s good to be the weatherhuman. Not only do you get to say whatever the hell you want to 20,000 people (well, let’s be honest: 2,000,000 people), you get to be in control of the weather. Remember yesterday when I swore at the weather for being an “inconsiderate asshole” (“So Rude, Hmph,” Daily Nexus, Oct. 18)? Yeah? Well looky, looky who bitched up yesterday. It ain’t nothing but a weatherhuman partay…partay…partay.

Wednesday’s forecast: Just don’t let it happen again. Allow me to remind you I own a pair of numchucks.