And so the countdown to Spring Break begins. Off to Cancun? Costa Rica? Cabo? Well, bon voyage, my travel-happy friends — I’m jealous of you.

That is, unless, you’re going on said fabulous vacation with a significant other. If you fall under this oxymoronic category, I have to ask you: What the hell are you thinking?

There’s a classic reason for the heavenly week of babes, booze and bikinis that falls between Winter Quarter’s dreary rains and Spring Quarter’s campuswide senioritis — and it doesn’t involve shopping for souvenirs with your lame girlfriend or boyfriend.

Spring Break in an exotic locale easily stacks the odds in your favor for a hot, foreign fling to brag about to all your friends come school’s return. The gorgeous beaches and swanky nightclubs provide for countless opportunities to seal the deal with a leggy blonde from U. of Hotness or, better yet, a foxy native that can show you the ropes of your vacation spot while coming complete with a perfect excuse to never call them again.

But let’s forget for a minute that vacation fling sex makes for the juiciest locker room exchanges. The future of your relationship could encounter some rocky territory if tested across foreign waters.

I know what you’re thinking. What could be more romantic than walking along the beach hand-in-hand with your honey? What better way to spice up that lukewarm connection than shacking up hotel-style with your sweetheart?

But Spring Break is just not the time for lovesick paramours. Think “Girls Gone Wild,” not Romeo and Juliet. The truth is that any chance for quality couple time on faraway soil is squelched by the droves of sexily clad bodies that your boyfriend or girlfriend will be too busy drooling over to tend to your clingy wiles.

With rampant body shots, MTV-caliber partying and mindless debauchery awaiting you on your island getaway, pangs of regret are sure to hit you the minute you step off the plane if your baggage includes a serious flame. Think it’s easy seeing your single friends getting it on sans commitment while being in the midst of the highest concentration of good-looking people you’ll encounter all year? Think again.

Don’t get me wrong. Anyone who can sustain a decent relationship in our I.V. cesspool gets major props from this single gal. But do you really want to spend an entire week playing “Temptation Island” with your steady squeeze? I didn’t think so.

So save the honeymooning for Christmastime skiing in the Alps or summer in the Hamptons. Ditch the ball-and-chain, book that sweet deal with a few of your closest friends and prepare to run amok this Spring Break. Your honey will be perfectly intact — and quite randy, I’d imagine — when you return.

Daily Nexus opinion editor Meghan Palma will be spending her Spring Break sans boyfriend in lovely San Francisco. Postcards from exotic locales welcome.