Over Winter Break I saw the greatest Christmas light display ever. On the fence
of this one house, someone had spelled out, in lights, “HO.” Not “HO HO HO.”
Just “HO.” Either Santa’s getting less talkative or some naughty kid thought
they could get presents after all by whoring themselves out … which might not
be a bad idea. Why stop at milk and cookies?

It would be inappropriate for me to now make some tasteless joke about Santa and

Tuesday’s forecast: “MERRY.” Merry indeed