A.S. wants to (not) have your babies. They’ve been distributing A.S. Initiative propaganda fliers with condoms attached. The connection between giving A.S. more money and having sex is not immediately clear to me. In fact, the two could not be more different in terms of attractiveness. The most logical conclusion is that A.S. is whoring itself out to the student body. For only an extra $10.40 per quarter, A.S. will be able to continue its “services” for us lustful students, one of which – according to the flier I’m looking at – is A.S. Elections… I think I have a headache.

Friday’s forecast: With your A.S. condom in hand, have fun hitting DP for free.