Editor, Daily Nexus,

I am writing in response to an article by Cory Anthony (“Save that FAFSA Check,” Daily Nexus, Sept. 28) regarding how to keep the keg parties rolling. This article was the most ridiculous piece of crock I’ve ever read. Please students, heed my warning.

Anthony suggested that when you have a keg party, you keep a “man on the fence doors” to regulate and to keep the police from coming on. Your big, drunken, responsible friend who is going to scare the police away by saying in his best Isla Vistan voice, “Nah, you’re not coming in.” As much as you’d like to deny it, a cop would come busting in faster than you can say “shit” and most likely put the drunk guy in jail. If the police see something going on that they don’t like, they are coming in.

And your other brilliant idea. And I quote: “Let no one leave with beer. Remind drunken kids on their way out that there certainly wasn’t any alcohol at this party.” Like your friend at the front door is really going to remember to tell every freshman on their way out to put their cup down and tell the cops all about the great “apple juice” party. Cory Anthony, you are living in a fantasy land.

The best way to keep the good times rolling is not to live in Cory Anthony’s fantasy world, but simply to know your rights. Though the cops ARE out there to protect and serve as we all know, don’t let them walk over you. I had a recent incident where a cop thought it was OK to steal all the components from our Kegerator, but my brother promptly put in a complaint to the Santa Barbara Police Dept. and we got it back. Simple as that.

And as far as the kegs go, forget them. You don’t need them. Just buy a bunch of beers and have some fun. The cops can’t prove you supplied any alcohol if everyone has their own alcohol at the party.

So Anthony, good try. Next time, however, let’s try to think our own dreams through a tad bit more.