Damn those unlucky few who didn’t snag tickets to the “Kill Bill” back-to-back sneak preview double feature. It was the best thing to come to UCSB since the tube top, but because of those few, we lucky ones must speak in code. Like, remember that one part, with the eye? And how cool was it when Uma had to… you know… up through the… you know? You know? And the part with the coyotes and the quicksand? And the Cyber-Lucy Liu? How kickass was that?

Drink of the Week

Blood and Sand
– 4 oz. Johnnie Walker red whisky
– tsp. grenadine
– orange juice
Poor whisky in a highball glass. Fill with orange juice. Drop a spoonful of grenadine over the back of the spoon and down the side of the glass.
Toast the cinematic bloodbath you may or may not have attended with a suitably sanguine cocktail.

Audience Participation

Best lines spoken by the audience during Wednesday night’s screening.
– “Does Lucy Liu play the Asian one or the black one?”
– “Wait – who’s that guy?”
– “Wait – what did that guy say when I asked who that guy was?
– “Oh, I get it now. She’s like, mad, or something.”
– “I think I read about this scene at imdb.com.”
– “I’m gonna have something for the online message boards tonight!”
– “I’ve been a big Uma fan since ‘Batman Forever.'”
– “What’s all that red stuff?”
– “I’m so pumped for Volume 3.”
– “Sorry, I only like brutal violence if it’s in ‘The Passion.'”